It will be a year in March 2021 of staying at home and working in pajamas. Boy, 2019 really wasn’t done with us. It had to stick around with us as COVID-19 and make 2020 look like a culprit. I had been waiting for 2021 just like everyone else with carry forward dreams. Something was different this New Year’s eve though. A lot, I know but there was more determination which I felt in my bones. I have always been a home body but my dreams and aspirations are not, so I felt confined last year like everyone else. But I realized a great deal about myself and the world in 2020 while I laid awake till 3 am every night.
Trying new things
We have heard and read this all over the internet and to be honest it looks like it comes from a place of privilege but it really depends on what is the “new” according to you. I was lucky enough to have free time between and after work so I could try to learn French, finish a book which was different from my usual reads, try a new work approach and also start The PS Blog. Yes this blog was born during the pandemic and it allowed me to dip my toe in the water. Many people who sadly lost their jobs during the pandemic found new ways to earn money and didn’t shy away from setting up a stall on streets to sell their specialty food, in spite of their college degrees. It is motivating to many who are going through tough times. It doesn’t all have to be productive; it can just be fun at times. My friend and I also tried a tarot reader and it was so much fun and a bit overwhelming too but I loved it because it was different.
Embracing my flaws…some of them
I was aware about some of my flaws and some were brought to my notice very kindly by my loved ones. What was different this time around was that I had nowhere to run. I have a tendency to not be conscious about my shortcomings and hence I kept repeating them and likewise regretting about them time and again. I make myself believe that I have moved on and let it go when in reality I drown myself in work or distract myself. While I was confined at home and there was nothing to distract me or tire me enough, I realized I didn’t actually let a lot of things go. So I made peace with some flaws and made a mental note of the ones I can still work on.
Saving money and donating
I am a spend thrift and there was usually bare minimum left in my account by the end of the month. I would be the worst person to ask for a loan. Life was all about the next sale, next trip, next restaurant and every next which was definitely not needed but wanted. Due to lockdown and my anxiety, I hardly ended up stepping out or ordering anything until a past few months and I realized the power of saving. I don’t want to brag but I am proud of myself that I could donate some money every month and help some of my people in these trying times. There is no joy like the joy of giving without expecting anything in return.
Counting my blessings
I maintain a gratitude journal but during the pandemic when everything looked bleak, I was grateful for even the smallest of things. I went back to the basics like food, clothing, shelter and water. I am grateful for these things because 2020 taught me to value what I already have and some people don’t even have these basic commodities. Gratitude journal allowed me to focus on the good and ignore the bad because honestly when you start journaling you don’t just note down what’s good but realize that there is at least one good thing that happens every single day and yet we take it for granted as if it’s not relevant or doesn’t count.
Home workouts are the best
Health is wealth. You can’t enjoy your new car if you have a terrible back ache. Our wealth is useless without a healthy body and mind. I was not the one who panicked when the gyms shut down because I was struggling at the gym and it was a task to walk all the way to the gym. I danced everyday using the live sessions available on cure.fit app. I not only noticed change but also realized that I don’t have to step out of my house to get fit or build a great physique. I can workout anytime and as many times as possible (by this I mean I can dance in the morning and practice yoga in the evening, please don’t lift weights multiple times unless you are an expert). You need determination and discipline to get fit, not a gym membership.
To embrace the thrift culture
I explored the world of thirfting during my endless hours of Instagram browsing. As Indians, we look down upon the culture of thrifting because “it is second hand”, “it is not good to wear someone else’s clothes”, “I prefer to buy new things”, “it’s unhygienic” and the reasons are endless. We are harming the environment and it’s high time we realize this and make conscious efforts. I got a few one of a kind pieces from IG thrift stores which I am sure nobody would have and that’s a plus for me. I like to avoid dressing in the same dress as every third person on the street. We don’t have to shop every clothing item through thrift stores but we can at least include some pieces which are thrifted, I mean I am sure nobody would say no to a vintage Burberry at a throw away price. Also there is nothing a good wash can’t fix, so give it a go.
Be vulnerable
I never fully trust anybody and always have my guards up high. It astounded me when people discussed their love lives, sex lives, divorces, domestic problems and sometimes share the ugliest of realities of their lives with me. Not because what I heard but because of how easily people shared it. The most difficult thing for me has been to open up to anybody. It so happened that I was telling my friend how embarrassed I was about a certain situation in life and she just told me that it’s ok because we all have to deal with something or the other and people will keep disappointing us but we need to trust, open up and let go. It sounds basic but there are many who find it difficult to trust people easily. I realized being vulnerable is a strength because it takes a lot of courage to trust and then trust some more.
Taking it slow
This one has been the toughest because I like to stay busy. I feel productive when I multitask and check everything off my to-do list and when I am unable to check everything off, I feel disappointed in myself. I feel I haven’t tried enough. Thanks to all my lovely friends who were my rock during this pandemic, I spoke to them and time and again what I heard was-“Take a break” & “Don’t be hard on yourself”. I was being self-critical every time things didn’t go my way. By the end of 2020, I realized some things are out of your control and you just need to take it slow and let things unfold. I realized my sentences had more full stops than my thoughts. I learnt to just do nothing when there was no way out.
I would love to know if you could relate to any of these or if you have some of your lessons to share so that we can keep learning from each other. See you next Wednesday!
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