This blogpost would have never happened if I didn’t have to turn my computer on for some “last minute” work. I told myself to just begin writing and opened my mini planner where I have five blogpost ideas for every Wednesday scheduled till December 2020 but here I am, not sticking to the schedule ever. I am definitely not one of those species who live by their planners. No matter how much I plan, I anyways do it at my own pace and what my mood is at that specific moment. Never underestimate the power of mood. Yours…or someone else’s. (Side note: For some weird reason, my spotify is playing “Ghagra” song while I write this.)
So I came across one blogpost idea in my planner for Sep 2020, which is “What’s on my mind when I am sick” and coincidentally it fits. Because I am sick right now. It is destiny and I was meant to write this right now. The puzzle pieces fit perfectly. Please don’t think I have gone cuckoo but that’s how I roll with sarcasm when I am down in the ditches. My sarcasm and comebacks are better when I am heavily drugged twice a day, under medical supervision. Not the kind of drugs which are finally tightening the noose around Bollywood’s neck right now. Let’s not get into that because we are here to read about me and my sickness hobbies.
Adulthood means responsibilities, paying taxes, being broke, lots of body ache and a decreased immunity which none of us thought would ever hit us, because dude we ate samosas off Raju bhaiya’s dirty canteen plates and savoured street food like no virus could attack us and there is no such thing as bacteria which will penetrate our beautiful bodies. Then one day you wake up on your 28th birthday and cry because you don’t know why and how you woke up with a bad cold and your body feels like 50 years old because of sleeping in a weird position. I got very sick about three years ago during Diwali and I felt depressed and sleepy with all the medicines, so I sat down and decided to buy some craft items and made Best Wishes cards for my friends and parents. It really pumped me up because I was so proud of myself for creating something beautiful during a hard time in life.
Last year when I felt my health was deteriorating, I decided to work out and that was the best decision in the right direction. I feel better everytime I work out or practice yoga. I feel like I have control when I work on my body. It makes me hopeful. It just makes me feel invincible every single day. It is a form of self love and I do feel guilty when I can’t do it due to sickness but I sit myself down (well then who would) and tell myself how important it is to listen to your body and relax. This year I begin blogging and writing is something which has been with me on good and bad days. The PS Blog was born during a pandemic and I get some good feedback from my friends and from absolute strangers at times. That itself is very motivating. I do struggle with consistency I don’t want to treat this as a job and take it slow.
Apart from that I talk to my friends and talk about random weird things. I am luckily blessed with a small group of people I can always turn to at my weakest and they won’t take advantage of that vulnerability. So I am very grateful for my friends and family for always being there and caring for me. I also focus on things I want to do to make life better for me overall. When you are sick and bedridden, you have a lot of time to think. You either feel depressed or think about your next move. Ideally, you should think positive and plan your next move in life but realistically, just cry, feel depressed, call a friend and cry some more and write down how you feel and tell yourself it’s not you, it’s the medicines. Honestly, it’s the medication which is making you all low and emotional, happens to all of us. I just wanted to put it out there how horrible it feels when you are sick and are on heavy medication, so that somebody can relate to it somewhere and doesn’t feel like they are the only ones.
So just take some time off, take your friends, binge watch your favourite sappy content and get ready for a new day. See you next Wednesday!
Comments